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About Traditional Art / Hobbyist KarolineFemale/Canada Group :icondeviant-antics: Deviant-Antics
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Deviant for 7 Years
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Mature content
Invincible :icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 0 0
I didn’t know how long it would take, getting over you.
I still think about you every once in a while.
How could I not?
I think about the ugly break up, with harsh words and cruel intentions. The things you said to try and hurt me, the things I told myself to try and ruin you forever in my mind, make you guiltier.
The awful bitterness from both sides; the internal struggle between trying to make this as painless as possible and giving into the growing hate.
The feeling in my stomach like all those butterflies just died and are drowning me, from the inside.
The tension in the air, the replay of your face, your voice, your tears when you realized I was serious this time.
The relief of it being over, the thorn removed from my side; but not realizing the gaping wound that needed closure, that needed something I would never get because you could not be mature enough or kind enough to give me even that.
That feeling of how love had soured to a sort of disdain, an anger fueled by shatte
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 0 0
This Ink On My Skin
“Do you have any tattoos?”
A simple question. The tiniest inflection; the smallest sneer on your face to let me know that you will carry judgement if I say yes.
I answer anyways.
“Yes. I do.”
Your eyes change, the sneer comes out of hiding. You ask politely, for the sake of social propriety: “What’s it about?”
I pause as I consider this. What is my tattoo about? I know you don’t care for that answer. You don’t realize the significance of that question, the underlying motive, the drive that would make me permanently scar my skin with ink to express what means the world to me.
You ask for the superficial. You ask about design, about aesthetics, about the little details that make up the physical of this incredible expression because in your mind, you have already dismissed the possibility of a meaning to this. You have already categorized my tattoo as something rash and shallow and trendy. You are already disappointed.
I smile anyw
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 0 0
Nature's Song
Thunder crashed as rain fell from the sky. The wind blew gently and coolly, sending a mist of soft rain to caress the girl in the forest. Walking under lamenting branches weighed down by tears, she felt their sorrow fall on her and trace her body. Her hair became darkened by their sadness, her body heavy from the rain. Puddles painted her canvas sneakers, darkening the fabric and chilling her to the bone. The girl shivered, pulled her dripping clothes closer to herself; the rain enveloped her almost tenderly while it stole her warmth. She turned up her music, blocking out the sound of nature.
The ground was adorned by pine needles that released a sweet perfume. As she hurried along in the forest, her soaked feet crushed the needles, overwhelming her senses with the smell. Wet leaves stuck to her ankles as she dodged the puddles, wishing she had brought an umbrella. Or at least some sensible shoes. She cranked her music higher, hoping the rain wouldn't damage her IPod.
At this thought,
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 3 0
Forgive and Forget
I stumble into my room gasping for air.
I'm choking. I'm choking.
I'm choking on anger, choking on hate, choking on this poison that is shoved down my throat every day. I'm choking on tears, choking on grudges, choking on those horrible things they say about me, my own flesh and blood calls me.
Blood calls me.
I shake my head angrily. They will not make me break. They will not make me hurt myself.
I can feel it growing, feeding on the poison. That murderous rage. That feeling of overwhelming red that obscures my vision, fills my lungs, runs through my veins.
I've never been an angry person. Always more tearful, more sad…more depressed.
But anger. Anger is new. Anger is ice-cold, so cold it hurts. So cold it burns, so hot it numbs. Anger is my new weapon. Anger is overpowering me.
If only…if only they'd use their fists instead of their words. If only they were brave enough to strike me. Then I could hit back, release all this pent-up hurt and rage and hurt
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 0 10
Darling by GummyBearKar Darling :icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 2 8 Sun-kissed by GummyBearKar Sun-kissed :icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 2 3
I remember the first time I felt myself drowning.
I was about eight years old. I hadn't quite realized how messed up things were around me. Things like the massive financial issues my family faced, the lie on which my parents had based their marriage, my sister's jealousy of me, the hatred of people around me; I didn't know what it was like to understand those things yet. All I knew was that it was a hot summer day and I was at a lake.
The details of where this lake was located were kind of vague. My eight year old self didn't know where she was; only that I was visiting some friend of my mom's, it was somewhere far away and my older sister was stuck with me.
The house of my mom's friend smelled strange; I automatically knew if I liked a place based on how it smelled. I didn't like the smell of this house; and it was really boring at the lady's house. When my mom's friend suggested we go swimming, my older sister and I were relieved to finally get out of that house.
The sun was warm on
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 2 8
I Hope You Had the Time of Your Life
Footsteps echo through the hallway
The dim lights giving it an eerie glow
My Converse sneakers scuff the floors
The hallway is empty
I trail my hands against empty lockers
Feeling the cool metal on my skin
I tiptoe down the hall, closing my eyes
Breathing in that familiar scent
As my footsteps awaken old memories
I stop in front of a locker and slide down to the ground
Remembering my first day, remembering my first impression
Compared to my easy familiarity with this old school now
Different memories spark different emotions
Embarrassment, happiness, annoyance, fear
But overall, I feel glad
That this is where I spent my year
Getting up, I walk down the hallway
Abandoned and quiet
So different compared to its usual noise
Walking down staircases, my footsteps keep echoing
Filling these empty halls
Filling my brain
I stop at a wall
Full of hand prints
I silently mouth the names
Of all my soon-to-be former classmates
A lump forms in my throat
As I think of moving forward
This bubble of com
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 3 19
Mature content
Battle with the Mirror :icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 4 19
Falling Apart
I'm falling apart.
Bits and pieces of my smile, hitting the floor and shattering into the air.
Shards of my heart, cracking and falling, disintegrating in the wind.
Every word that passes between us makes me ache more.
Every offer of secret meetings makes me want more.
Every "I love you" makes me imagine more.
Every good-bye rips me to shreds a little more.
This smile I keep in place?
It's a mask.
This laugh I use?
It's an act.
No one knows but you.
No one knows but you how much a single touch...
A single word...
A single moment of being alone.
No one knows how much it means.
I'm tired of pretending we're just another couple.
I'm tired of pretending we'll just happily date for forever.
I want to be free to leave with you and never come back.
And I know you offer this to me.
But I still wait.
I wait.
And I wait.
I wait until the next time you can hold me.
I wait until the next time my mask can dissolve and I can truly smile.
I wait until I can breathe again.
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 6 17
What do you believe?
What do I believe?
I am so confused.
I know what I've been brought up believing.
There is a God and He loves you very much.
But do I believe that anymore?
I know all the words to the songs, I know how to pray and what to pray for...
But I only ever feel empty.
I feel...nothing.
No faith.
You need faith.
No hope.
You need hope.
No belief, no love, no answer.
I don't even feel angry anymore.
You can't be angry with God and not believe in him. It doesn't work.
What do I believe?
What do you believe?
I don't want to die.
I don't want to go to hell.
If there is a heaven, will they even let me in?
I've done things...
You've sinned.
But everyone does.
They say it's so simple.
Just a step of faith.
But what if you have no faith?
What happens then?
I'm tired of pretending I believe.
Lying is a sin right?
Thou shalt not bear false witness.
They want me to believe.
They don't want m
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 3 29
Are you okay?
I'm absolutely terrified.
Yeah, I'm fine.
I'm slipping away again, going through the motions.
I feel numb.
You sure?
My face smiles but I don't feel it.
I laugh but it doesn't seem real.
Yeah. I'm just tired.
I'm always tired.
Is that even an excuse anymore?
Okay then.
I don't want to push you away.
I love you.
But I can't help this feeling.
What if I told you I miss you?
What if I told you I'm not happy unless I'm with you?
What if I told you I'm dead inside but I smile so you don't see it?
Actually...never mind.
I don't want to let you down.
I don't want to hurt you.
Wait, what? Hey, what's wrong?
I don't want to hurt you.
I don't want to make things harder on you.
I'm sorry I keep lying, but I can't help it.
I just feel numb.
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 8 18
Ulquiorra Cifer by GummyBearKar Ulquiorra Cifer :icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 3 8
Last Innocence
"It's a nice day out, isn't it?" I asked.
He smiled and nodded. "That it is."
A car zoomed by us as we walked down the street. The forest around us cast shadows on the pavement we walked on. The sun was blazing hot and I could feel the sweat forming on my forehead. I dragged the back of my hand over it and wiped my hands on my jean shorts. It was hot; but I loved summer.
Suddenly, I felt his hand bump mine. His fingers lightly tugged on mine until we were holding hands. I looked at him and smiled, still shy about this new aspect to our relationship. Was this really the guy I would have debates about who was Sherlock for hours on end?
We walked in silence for a little bit until we started swinging our arms. I laughed and he smiled, swinging our arms higher and higher. After a few moments, we stopped.
"So, where do we go now?" He asked.
"Well," I said, looking around us, "we can either continue on the road or walk through the field."
He shrugged. "What do you want to do?"
I shrugged. "Th
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 4 5
"Hey, love?" She asked.
"Yeah?" He turned to her.
She kissed his cheek and smiled. "Nothing."
He smiled and kissed her head. They both sat on a couch in the basement. The lights were on, the TV was blank. He had his arms wrapped around her waist and she was leaning on his shoulder. They had spent the perfect summer afternoon together. He fingered her damp hair from when they had gone swimming.
Suddenly, they heard a barking sound. They both laughed. A small dog came running into the room, wagging her tail frantically. The couple stayed where they were for a moment before he released her so she could stand up.
"Come on puppy. We'll take you out." She said, pulling his hand and leading him upstairs. When she turned off the lights, he pulled her back and kissed her. She smiled and hugged him. He whispered, "I love you."
She felt warmth spread through her as she whispered back, "Love you too."
Taking his hand again, they walked up the stairs and out the door, stopping to put the dog on a l
:icongummybearkar:GummyBearKar 2 62


Flower Boy by MaeofClovers Flower Boy :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 7 1 Oh Boy by MaeofClovers Oh Boy :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 8 2 Azalea by MaeofClovers Azalea :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 13 1 Glory by MaeofClovers Glory :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 16 3 Honey by MaeofClovers Honey :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 14 3 One Of Those Winters by MaeofClovers One Of Those Winters :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 14 8 JackSketch by Nami15 JackSketch :iconnami15:Nami15 46 9 xCosmicKissx by Nami15 xCosmicKissx :iconnami15:Nami15 16 3 Love me by Twimper Love me :icontwimper:Twimper 11 13 Kitties by Twimper Kitties :icontwimper:Twimper 7 4 Together We Will Live Forever by alicexz Together We Will Live Forever :iconalicexz:alicexz 5,672 221 Dark by MaeofClovers Dark :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 12 5 Heat by MaeofClovers Heat :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 24 5 Otherworld by MaeofClovers Otherworld :iconmaeofclovers:MaeofClovers 15 10 Freedom : Not a Number by DestinyBlue Freedom : Not a Number :icondestinyblue:DestinyBlue 12,940 587 She's brOKen by DestinyBlue She's brOKen :icondestinyblue:DestinyBlue 29,898 1,627


I must say, this is a pretty interesting piece of art! And there's honestly so many ideas and symbols in this that I don't quite know w...

I must admit, I'm a sucker for anything with an Alice in Wonderland feel. And this is quite Wonderland-like. All the symbols add a lot ...




GummyBearKar has started a donation pool!
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I'm looking to decorate my room with some of the beautiful art found here on DA.

Every point counts :heart:

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  • :iconizzyishalfdino:
    Donated Jul 31, 2012, 7:28:03 PM
Hey guys,

So it's been a while. ^^;


And I'm partly sorry I haven't been around here lately...but partly not too. My life has been such a whirlwind this past year that I didn't think of going on DA, or even having the chance to draw or write. But that's not an entirely bad thing. because I *think* I'm happy.

Yep. Happy.

You know, no depressed writing lately.

Although, it is no REAL excuse to not start posting some creative writing, as well as photos (which I have so many to post, it's getting a little ridiculous).

SO, to sum up this rather tired journal (because, my fellow Deviants, I have been going through many of the comments, deviations, forum threads, journals, replies, polls, etc that have accumulated since I've been gone (and sorry I didn't comment/reply as much as I used to, it would be crazy to answer a a year's worth of creativity!!))...

I think I'm back.

Things may be looking up for me.


Because, I may or may not be getting a dorm room downtown...which means I cut my transportation time from 4 hours to 20 minutes...


And, you know, study for my 13 classes...:icondepressedplz:

I MAKE NO PROMISES...but with a new laptop, and possibly hours more of free time...I do promise to make an effort.

AND finish going through my last 93 deviations. :iconcrycryplz:


But not for long! :D
  • Listening to: The Piano Guys <3
  • Reading: Game (I Hunt Killers Sequel)
  • Playing: with some dangerous thoughts


Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
Music is my religion :heart:

I'm studying to be a jazz singer and consequently, love all types of music...AND I LOVE TO SING!

I also love to write and take pictures.
Warning: A lot of my writing is deep, dark and emotional. If you can't handle it, don't read it.

Oh...and here's a cookie :cookie: :la:

Current Residence: not telling you
Favourite genre of music: Country, rock or inspirational
Favourite style of art: anime
MP3 player of choice: matter how scratched it is :D
Skin of choice: my own, of course!
Favourite cartoon character: Danny Phantomn
Personal Quote: Poke me and DIE!!! or just. "i got bored in [insert class here] so I drew this."


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MaeofClovers Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2013
GummyBearKar Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist

MaeofClovers Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2012
psssssssst, dad's hooooome, caaaaaaall meeeeeee
sowhataboutme Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2012  Student Writer
wow almost too late. anyway HAPPY B-DAY!
GummyBearKar Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Awww thank you so much! :aww:
Twimper Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy Deviantart Birthday hehe
GummyBearKar Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks Twimp ;)
GummyBearKar Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Crazy-Ink Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave~! :redbullglomp:
GummyBearKar Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hey, thank YOU for the awesomeness! :la:
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